Feminism, and why it scares us

By Virginia Cornett, Wisteria Magazine

“Feminism, and Why It Scares Us,”  takes a look at why feminism is viewed as a negative movement in mainstream media, and why the word generates so much hatred when it is meant to unify. This article takes a quick look at the stereotypes, history, and meaning behind the feminist movement in the hopes to shed light onto the powerful movement that continues to divide us. 


As an outspoken feminist I’m perfectly used to scoffs or belittling remarks when mentioning the defining movement that has paved the way for countless women throughout countless generations. I've met numerous women who are afraid of labelling themselves as feminists, despite believing wholeheartedly in the cause itself, fearing that the word will brand them with a new, indelible persona; one of a radical, raging, aggressive, well, bitch. So why is society so scared of feminists? Why does the mere mention of feminism bring a shudder or an eye roll to all within its vicinity? Why does a word that has connected and empowered so many young women have such a negative connotation? 

I’ll be honest, I’ve been scared to tell others that I am a feminist more than a few times, out of fear that I’ll be looked down upon, laughed at, or not taken seriously, and my fears aren’t unjustified. When asked to describe feminists in one word, participants most commonly described feminists as liberal, crazy, extreme, radical, annoying, Nazi women, sissy, and lesbians. Seeing this, it’s perfectly understandable why many are afraid of calling themselves a feminist. It's exhausting to think that a movement built to fight against systemic sexism is time and time again misunderstood or not taken seriously, while supporters are slapped with cruel and ignorant assaults led by equally cruel and ignorant opponents with no capacity or will to sympathize with the movement they are so passionately against. For those who identify with the movement, feminism is not only the belief that men and women should be equal, but that we should have access to the same opportunities, to the same careers, to the same salaries. Feminists are tired of sexism, of harassment, of assault, of unfair stereotypes, of not being taken seriously, of the wage gap, of women being criticized for every move they make. And if you asked people if they were tired of those things as well, an overwhelming majority would say yes, but the line is drawn at the label...people simply do not want to be labeled as feminists. In a survey conducted by Huffington Post/YouGov, only 20% of Americans considered themselves to be feminists, but when asked if they believe that “men and women should be social, political, and economic equals,” 82% of participants said they did. So why is feminism the dealbreaker?

Naturally as humans, we fear what we can’t understand, and people tiptoe around feminism because they fall prey to the many misconceptions about the movement that can make it sound pretty scary. In a similar survey conducted by YouGov regarding feminism, 41% of participants agreed that feminists are too extreme, and 25% agreed that feminists hate men. So, let's debunk these stereotypes, starting with the belief that feminists are too extreme. What's interesting about this statement is that through my research, no one seems to be able to pinpoint exactly how feminists are “too extreme,” but what I've concluded thus far is that feminists are “easily offended radicals who make up wild stories of harassment and assault.” Looking through the extensive history of feminism, it's not surprising that these are commonly held beliefs, as suffragettes, or first wave feminists, were depicted as violent and boisterous shrews, second wave feminists were considered dirty and petty for discussing bras and body hair, and third wave feminists were called man-hating and crazy, all in the media.

Media representation has never celebrated feminism, in fact, it has done pretty much the opposite by perpetuating negative stereotypes, making it no wonder so many people view feminism as how it's portrayed; that is, very poorly. Another argument I've frequently heard is that feminism is too extreme because the movement has become a “trend;” something that isn't about the movement itself anymore. One opponent claims that because “feminists now display feminism through t-shirts, stickers and water bottles that read “We Should All Be Feminists,” as if feminism is a trendy slogan,” feminism is “too extreme,” but how does expressing your beliefs on a t-shirt suddenly make a movement too extreme? How can you equate a movement becoming more mainstream and accepted to it becoming too extreme?  Feminism’s lack of adequate and fair representation in the media throws the movement into an unfavorable light, displaying feminists as man-hating angry women for as long as the movement has been around, so it isn't surprising that many have grown to believe it. Furthermore, if displaying your beliefs makes a movement too extreme, then please feel free to stick that same label onto anyone who wears political merchandise, because politics is a serious business that should be focused on content and not a “trendy slogan,” right?

Now, a very popular theory is that feminists “hate men,” and dream of a world where women dominate over men. Despite many believing that this is a widely held hope in the feminist community, anyone who believes this does not represent feminism; it is completely against the ideology feminists have fought so hard to uphold. Feminism is about equality and leveling the playing field for both genders, not one sex dominating over the other, and feminists don’t just fight for women’s rights and issues, but for members of the LGBTQ+ community, ethnic and racial minorities, and against toxic masculinity and unfair stereotypes against men. Speaking out against negative social constructs traditionally enforced by men doesn't make feminists “man-haters,” it simply means we are trying to right the wrongs of the past to encourage a world in which men and women are treated equally. 

Despite fighting for women’s right to vote, encouraging women to speak out against harassment and assault, and fighting for overall gender equality, feminism is still viewed as something negative, and that’s not likely to change very soon, but by educating yourself on feminism, you can make those important first steps towards ending gender inequality. I am not ashamed to be a feminist, despite the names and stereotypes that come with it.


I am not ashamed to be a member of a movement that is actively making the world a safer place for both men and women, and neither should you, because we should all be feminists.

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